scared and hopeful....

...that's what happens when you take a chance on someone.....you never want to be hurt again. but it's hard not to notice that
of hope you have now. its a great thing. hope. heck my 2nd daughters middle name is even hope. i thought it was cute naming the first girl's middle name faith. and the 2nd hope. but i never realized just how much those names would come to mean to me.

i have faith and hope in you.. i hope that means as much to you as it does for me to say it.

can't breathe....

feels like a boulder is on my chest.....but yet i keep breathing. heavier and heavier. I'm getting past the point of panic........now im feeling the rage....it's building up and gives me strength.......people have a problem with anger....but can you feel this surge of adreniline and emotions.....driven by pure instinct.....like an animal........a force of nature. litteraly feeling 10 feet tall and bullet proof....

but im not........cause when all that power has faded.....the only thing left is you and the fallout of the damage you just caused.

and that sucks.